a leap of faith

first of all, i want to thank everyone who gave me their two cents toward my struggle the other day! it really helped me a lot, with all the words of encouragement. i really really appreciate it!

with that said, i've decided to apply for that job. after much deliberation, a few more conversations with justin, and spending 4 days at home for the holiday, i know this is the right thing to do. i figure i'd rather apply, and then have to make the decision later, than not, and most likely wonder "what if" someday.

i may apply and not get the job.

i may get the job, but not get offered the money to make it worthwhile.

i may get news on my current job that makes me not care what happens with this one.

i may get the job, and decide it's exactly what i want to do.

i'm leaving it up to fate. i have faith that what is meant to be will happen. if i'm meant to get it, and move home, it'll happen. if not, then i'll know that too.

so for now, the decision was easy. yes i will apply, because it would be so stupid not to. the real decision will be if i actually am offered the position. then i'll probably come back, freaking out again, trying to figure shit out.

but for now, i'm taking it one day at a time, and seeing how it goes...

<3